Enraged student quotes, "Screw Quest"

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25 February 2013 9:14 PM
Trevor Gross

Starting somewhere between lunch and fourth block today, Quest's servers began to have issues, making homework (specifically in the subjects of physics, chemistry, and various math classes) nearly impossible to complete. This fueled the already hot fire for disgust in the difficulty and lengthiness of the average day's homework, pushing many students over the top. One of these students reacted violently, stating "screw Quest."

Quest is notorious for failing students often for reasons based on its artificial intelligence, including no mercy for answers that are just over 1% off, confusion with time zones and due dates, extremely long study guides, and subtraction of points for multiple wrong answers in many subjects. Some questions can also be confusing or unrelated to the topic the quest covers, though this is a rare occurrence due to Quest's silicon-based intelligence. One student presented a sample physics Quest problem (it is unknown whether this was taken from an actual Quest assignment or not, though the first possibility is more likely)

 "If you have a box weighing fourteen apples and the coefficient of friction is math binder, how many tacos can you fit in a sombrero made of friction?"

Despite these issues, Quest continues to improve its services and remains an industry leader in the area of online-based assignments for math-related classes. I can assure you that their whole team is working hard to get the service back up on its feet and running.

As of the time of writing, Quest's services are still not functioning one hundred percent correctly.

Edit: very shortly after the time of publishing, about 9:16, Quest has been working as usual. All thanks to the UTexas team.

 


Comments

TheMightyDuckMan
02/26/2013 5:45pm

Quest is a lot like a journey... nobody likes journeys except idiots and crazy people.

Reply
02/28/2013 9:18am

;dsapoihf;oidsh

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Her-my-knee
03/01/2013 10:42am

I didn't even know that it had failed. I didn't have any Quest homework that day. But this article was hilarious. (And I would have been outraged had I had any homework.)

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Mr. Alwardt
03/04/2013 5:40pm

I miss you guys. Funny blog; I enjoyed the article on me. Keep it up. I might be back next year.

Reply
<3<3I LOVE JOHN ALWARDT<3<3 (___)__):::::::::::::::::::D
03/05/2013 4:25pm

Ok.

Reply



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