The ubiquitous IAM student laptop. The proud workhouse of the IA. It is the most useful tool in a student's arsenal to get their work done, able to store gigabytes and gigabytes of both schoolwork and pictures downloaded from the internet.

At the same time, sometimes it can be hard to properly take care of this useful piece of technology. For that reason, I AM Action News has thoughtfully composed an easy to use reference article to help ease your pain.

1. Reimage Often!

This magical cure all should be your first go-to in proper Laptop maintance. While many only decide to get reimaged when there is "no other way," we here suggest being proactive in your reimaging habits! Every few days, get your laptop reimaged! Sure it may cost $50, but the peace of mind knowing everything is back to a clean slate will ease your worries: well worth the price! 

Reimaging doesn't just work as periodic maintance, reimagry is known to be especially effective in fixing screens, keyboards, laptops, and missing screws! Get your laptop reimaged today at your friendly neighborhood reimaging center.

Protip!  Set a random timer set to go off at a random time, and when it rings, immediately drop all that you're doing to get your laptop reimaged. In this way, you can catch those pesky viruses off-guard and catch them with their metaphorical pants down.

2. Charge Up!

It is common knowledge that laptops require a steady diet of electricities in order to function at their highest level, just as how teenagers require a proper mixture of caffine and oxygen in order to not fall asleep or asphixiate. 

Always remember to plug your laptop in at night and while not in use. Try to bring a charger at school with you. Failing that, make sure you have enough money to bribe the people who do have extra chargers. $5 will get you as much charging as you could ever want, but $1 is fine for an hour alone with an outlet.

3. Hold Properly!

Dogs are pretty cool (unless you're a cat person). You'd never pick up Mr. Fluffums or Rex by his ears, now would you? Hopefully not, (unless you're a cat person), because that would cause pain to the dog.

In much the same way, holding a laptop by the screen causes your laptop to feel pain, although arguably not as much as the pain you feel when the screen hinges snap.

Also, generally speaking, its inadvisable to hold your laptop loosely. Much like small children, laptops which slip out of hands tend to cause a fair amount of panic.

And mess.

4. Be Vigilent!

Watch out for shady websites! Those Nigerian Princes do not actually live in Nigeria! Google Images does not have a good safety reputation  Anything and everything can and will  give you a virus. Blackboard is notorious for slipping in the occasional virus to make the school some yam-cash (see /things-fall-apart.html)

Watch out for puddles of liquids when selecting a proper place to set down your laptop. Do not be fooled by transparent liquids such as water! They can and will  get your laptop wet, sticky, or worse: wet and sticky.

They can also fry the circuits too.

5. When All Else Fails...(!)

Give your computer some XPerience in Windows by throwing it out of one. It may or may not make things work, but it sure will make you feel better.

Because sometimes, laptops fail, or they decide to be haters, or take an impromptu dirt nap in the middle of an unsaved history essay, and as a wise man* once said, "Never trust a computer you can't throw out a window."



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    March 2013